This is the response that I gave my brother after a great comment that he posted on the June 11th Blog. It was a little long for a comment and I think it has some good insight into what I think so I thought I would post it. Let me know what you think.
Sharing the Experience,
So sorry that It took me so long to respond David.
First to address - yes, I am dependent on God, and probably more that you know, I sincerely believe that I can't live this life to the fullest and with the fullest Joy that i have today with out a true and intimate relationship with God. (I tried it for 18 years, it wasn't as good, I promise) As far as this trip - with out God traveling is possible, you see that all the time, but i can not make the impact for Christ that I want to make with out full dependency on Him and His Holy Spirit that lives inside me. God has given me the power to make an impact for him wherever I choose to go.(Acts 1:8)
That brings me to the "bouncing around." Going to Costa Rica, on Staff with FCA, Going to El Salvador is all MY Choice. I choose to do all these things. There are other opportunities that I can pursue but I choose these ones - why? Because I feel, (through Prayer, time in His word, advising from close friends) that this is the direction that God has for me. Shannon and I have talked about this a lot and believe whole heartedly that our next step together in this life is to go to Costa Rica.
So, it's not bouncing around aimlessly but with purpose, choosing to follow a certain direction that we feel God is leading us. God’s direction will be the greatest direction for us. Now, I believe there are other direction, very good directions that we could go, and God will use us non the less, but I believe that there is always a "best way" unless otherwise directed. (I have examples of those as well.)
My Strength and eager ness comes from God, and it is natural - in us - because we are all made by God. So if I am strong in something it's because god made me that way - It all comes from God.
Finally, as far as mistakes Go, I believe all mistakes are choices that we have had and for some reason we chose incorrectly. It's our choice and we must reap the consequences. (I'll call it what it is - sin) Here's what is so cool - God loves me anyway, and chose to love me no matter what mistakes I make and he will use those mistakes for His Glory, which often means I receive some benefit from my mistakes in the future. (Again, many, many, SO many examples)
This is a great conversation that will have to be shared over a long evening, great meal, a bottle of wine that you choose - you know the drill.
Love you bro
Your dependent brother,